on Sunday, August 23, 2015

The way Christian fasting has been redefined, modified and advertised is beyond me.What are Christians turning into? :p This post is inspired by my youngest & chubbiest sis, Asanwa (nickname). Her weight loss regime is histerical. The gurl is beyond me, mehn. So I come home on a Saturday evening only to see amazing fruitsall over my sewing table. Yeah…I design and make clothes. I enjoy my job. Click here for more on sewing. Back to the gist, I see kiwi, blueberries…I mean blueberries in Naija???? Found majorly in supermalls and you bet they ain’t cheap. Not that expensive too sha. I turned to ask my sister what the occasion is, only to hear she’s going on a fast. Daniel’s fast.

DANIEL’S FAST???? Wha.Tha.Heck does that even mean? I may not know all of bible revelations, but last time I checked Daniel REFUSED all these ajebutter food that was served to him from the king’s table.

Fasting 2


The story eh…I mean my Asanwa’s version. I just weak. I asked her to show me where Daniel was eating kiwi and drinking banana+apple+watermelon+avocado smoothie in the bible. Yes oh…she actually started preparing mouth-watering smoothies.

Then she advised me to read the book of Daniel. Fine. Oya, what chapter? Blank look. My dear people, she had nooo idea! Then she waved her hand impatiently and said ‘try’ chapters one to three. I gave up. Then excitedly she called me back and began to show me pictures of ‘sisters’ doing the Daniel’s Fast.

The Hustle is Real, People.

From potato salad to stir-fry okra to vegetable stir-fry+dried fish…biko is this one still fasting abi groove? Then PROUDLY she showed me their group chat, instructions and motivating declarations to say every morning.

One chic in the group chat wrote “sisters, we can do this. Daniel refused the king’s meal and on the third year, he was promoted supernaturally. So…keep the faith. God will do same for us.”   Back to the real world. I started laughing so hard as she was reading this quote. I laughed eh! She sef joined me. I told her…”na so una go dey chop king food up & down & miss ‘God will do it for us’ and gain weight on top the matter sef.”

To crown it all,she ate eba that same night. Or ‘tasted’ it as she corrected me. Please help me judge this matter? Is this a fast?


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  • Reply Abeni

    Hilarious! You have no idea how many more things have been fine tuned by christians to suit themselves. I should start a Daniel fast too biko considering I want to add some weight :)

    Sunday, August 23, 2015 at 3:15 PM
    • Reply EbonyDuchess

      LOL! The irony of this Daniel’s fast! They actually gain weight. And no word about prayer in this fast oh! Smh. :)

      Thanks for stopping by Abeni.

      Sunday, August 23, 2015 at 4:56 PM
  • Reply kabuoy

    Lmaooo! The memes tho.
    I’m hearing Daniel’s fast for the first time ooo. Loool. I’m pretty sure Daniel stuck to watery beans and maybe garri in his time… not smoothies et all those mende mende your sister and are friends are eating loool.
    The other type is white fast… that I know of anyway. no oil, salt, sugar I think… so you are restricted to fruit, coconut, garri, corn or tasteless food. very very hard somthn! Lol.

    Monday, September 7, 2015 at 12:13 AM
    • Reply EbonyDuchess

      Halo Kabuoy. Lmao @ watery beans. Chai! That is the real fast…you know. My sis n friends…I give up jare.

      Thanks for stopping by. :)

      Monday, September 7, 2015 at 8:59 PM
  • Reply Berry Dakara

    Lol, maybe I should bring this up in my next Bible study post. I’ve done the Daniel fast a few times – in Daniel 1, when given the opportunity to learn the way of the Babylonians, Daniel and his guys refused to eat the king’s foods and instead requested for only vegetables and water. That’s the basis of the Daniel fast. At first I thought it was weird but found myself more looking forward to the time I’d break a regular fast, than actually praying. So for me, it “works.”

    There are also lifestyle fasts where you abstain from watching TV or using social media, etc. I guess these things have come up, because in those days there was no technology option.

    P.S. If you’re used to eating meat, trust me, the Daniel fast is harder than a regular timed fast. It’s after a few days that you’ll realize how much your body wants meat or fish or chicken or sugar, that you’ll know you need to overcome your flesh.

    Friday, January 15, 2016 at 6:33 PM
    • Reply EbonyDuchess

      Hi Berry! Thanks for the detailed info on Daniel’s fast. What my sis prepared all through “her” proclaimed fast blew my mind! You say red meat??? She improvised with “white” meat a.k.a chicken in her sumptuous salads. Smh.

      She ought to read your comment to know the real deal. :) As for the lifestyle fast, it’s the best!

      Thanks for stopping by. Xoxo…

      Friday, January 15, 2016 at 8:33 PM

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